It's pretty clear by now that Pauly D is the most marketable and business savvy member of the "Jersey Shore" cast (sorry, Snooki). He could just sit back and watch the bucks flow in from all his endorsements, but he keeps on hustling: whether it's spinning on his own spinoff, getting into the booze biz or touring with Britney--dude's always busy.

You could even say...he's in the DRIVER'S SEAT. So not surprisingly, he's helming the 2012 DJ Pauly D So Fresh & So Clean Celebrity Car, Bike & Concert Supershow (yes, that's the official name). The August 12 one-day-only mega-event in his home state Rhode Island will feature the year's hottest cars and bikes, including custom celebrity rides. And, of course, Pauly D on the ones and twos and 20-inch rims.

So if you're a gearhead, a juicehead, or just in the neighborhood, be sure to check out www.ricarshow.com for tickets and more information.

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Comedian Tom Sibley created the popular blog Subway Douchery, which makes fun of subway dimwits. Now he lives in subway-deficient Los Angeles and must mock people on the roads as Rubbernecker.

To protect and to serve...and to park as we please! I'll be the first to admit that the authorities have earned the right to park in places that us civilians aren't allowed. It's essential to the execution of their job. To stop them from parking wherever they please would put innocent lives at risk. Have I laid it on thick enough? I think so. All that being said, parking like this in front of a 7-Eleven is just a slap in all our law-abiding faces. We all try to properly stuff ourselves into these tiny spaces out of respect to humanity, but then this po-po pops in and does whatever he wants because his shotgun is mounted on the dash.

I happened to be inside this 7-Eleven purchasing the essentials, (milk, eggs, Spicy Nacho Doritos) when the officer entered. He was the kind of cop that is always filming his own personal sequel to "Training Day" in his imagination. Let's just say his sunglasses never came off and he walked into the employees-only bathroom like he owned the place. Or at least like someone that was no stranger to their toilet. I felt as if he was going to write me a ticket for my Doritos exceeding the state of California's "Spicy Limit." All this being said, I got  in my car, put on the "Drive" soundtrack and pretended to be Ryan Gosling for the next couple hours whilst eating my Doritos. So who am I to complain?

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Comedian Tom Sibley created the popular blog Subway Douchery, which makes fun of subway dimwits. Now he lives in subway-deficient Los Angeles and must mock people on the roads as Rubbernecker.

If you can't see your name in lights, you can always paint it on the side of your car! The entertainment business is notoriously difficult to break into so you have to be creative. Some people do it with a clever YouTube video, some do it with a hilarious blog on MTV Clutch, and others turn their cars into makeshift needy transformers of self promotion. Independent film has been waiting for a novelty car with zero visibility that is almost certainly not street legal.

And now, Rubbernecker's Top 3 scenarios where we'd love to see this car:

1. Funeral precession - "You know I'm really gonna miss Mike but... someone write that website down because independent film always cheers me up!"

2. Fast food drive thru after midnight - "Would you like some ketch up, sir? Also, how's the movie business treatin' ya?", the drive thru attendant then stifled a laugh.

3. Used car lot - "As you can see, the previous owner was a filmmaker..."

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Comedian Tom Sibley created the popular blog Subway Douchery, which makes fun of subway dimwits. Now he lives in subway-deficient Los Angeles and must mock people on the roads as Rubbernecker.

It takes a classy human being to put a sticker like this on their automobile. Did this man see it at an automotive specialty store and couldn't get his wallet out fast enough? Or is it a custom decal because he was being asked for so many rides and in turn had to ask for so much sex from the guys' girlfriends? Rubbernecker has decided to break this sticker down point for point:

"Don't ask for a ride..."
A suped-up two door hatchback is...well, it's still a two door hatchback. When those of us over 5-foot-2 are looking for a ride, we'll exhaust all other options before folding ourselves like laundry to fit into your adorable fire engine red Babe Mobile.

"...and I won't ask to f*** your girlfriend"
It is very kind of you to ask me for permission. I suppose leaving the decision completely up to my girlfriend would be too post-1920s. I can tell from your classy car that you like to keep things classic, like pre-women's suffrage classic. However, not too classic, like medieval classic. After all, you're asking, not acting like a nobleman invoking Prima Nocta on our wedding night.

"...f***..."
It takes a lot of guts to have the F-bomb written on your car. First, it makes you a cop magnet. Second, my girlfriend's parents will not approve of you. Even if you explained to them that you asked my permission first, they are salt-of-the-earth people and disapprove of spicy language. Even if I let you f*** my girlfriend, she will never take you to Thanksgiving.

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Comedian Tom Sibley created the popular blog Subway Douchery, which makes fun of subway dimwits. Now he lives in subway-deficient Los Angeles and must mock people on the roads as Rubbernecker.

I'm a simple man. I like my car to get me from Point A to point B as comfortably as possible with the radio playing loud. Rarely have I looked out my back window and thought, "Sure, I can see out but it's just so plain. Why can't it be more TERRIFYING?!?" I tend to like my view to be as unobstructed as possible so I don't, say, cause a horrific accident. But that's just me, I can be a real party pooper. Apparently in the great state of Pennsylvania, aesthetic counts for more than basic visibility.

Pictured above, we have the rear window of a pickup truck (big surprise there!) completely covered with some kind of demon that is...well...demonically gazing at all the cars with the misfortune of driving behind this truck. Best part? The demon has its hands eagerly pressed against the glass. As if to say, "Let me at 'em! I vant to gobble up ze souls of all ze autos behind us!" Yes, the demon speaks in a German Dracula accent as I imagine most demons do. We here at Rubbernecker applaud the driver for let their freak flag fly but scold them for reducing their blind spot visibility!

Today's picture was sent our way via Twitter by the lovely @iamqueenfal. Want Tom to mock a photo you took? Tweet it to @TheTomSibley or @MTVClutch.

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Black Eyed Peas' Will.i.am told Jay Leno that he's starting his own car company called IAMAUTO. His intent is to create more jobs in his birthplace of East Los Angeles while also fulfilling his need to live in a more "TRON"-like world. The car is a futuristic sporty ride built on a Chrysler chassis using a lot of OEM parts. That will ensure this concept-looking ride remains street legal when it ends up in mass production.

Will.i.am didn't give Leno any details on the starting price, or when it will be available to the super-rich public, or any of the car's other features besides the signature Beats By Dr. Dre sound system. Luckily, we're experts at making wild guesses on what selling points an automobile designed by a mildly insane celebrity will offer. Here are seven features we imagine the IAMAUTO cars will include.
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Comedian Tom Sibley created the popular blog Subway Douchery, which makes fun of subway dimwits. Now he lives in subway-deficient Los Angeles and must mock people on the roads as Rubbernecker.

FINALLY! The only thing that was really holding me back from covering my body in ironic tattoos was the inconvenience of actually going to the tattoo parlor. Who wants to deal with all those rowdy drunken sailors or giggling groups of 20-year-old ladies who continue to get tramp stamps for unknown desperate reasons? It was only a matter of time until some genius created a tetanus delivery van!

When having needles burrowed deep into your skin and rolling the proverbial dice with any number of intravenously transferred diseases, you want safety and hygiene to be of the utmost importance. And nothing says, "TOTALLY CLEAN!" like a friggin' van! It's not like windowless white vans have any kind of negative stigma in modern culture. With any luck, vans like this will be as common as ice cream trucks on the Fourth of July and they'll happily usher in the apocalypse.

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The classic stainless steel sports car (in name only) was a financial, mechanical and legal disaster. Its founder and visionary creator John DeLorean became a criminal flim-flam artist who used government funds to give the highly unemployed Irish people an ounce of hope, only to have it snatched away again. In addition, many of its chief developers became disgraced businessmen with criminal records, lost their careers and even their freedom in some instances.

Ultimately, the only true survivor of the DeLorean Motor Company's downfall is the car itself. It's sleek and shiny design, jagged rear windshield and gull wing doors made it iconic even before "Back to the Future" secured its pop culture immortality. Even though the original Ireland factory long ago closed its doors, DeLorean fans continue to keep the dream alive. Those diehards will be rewarded for their efforts in the near future. Recently, there was an announcement that an electric model of the classic car, the DMCEV, will be released.

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As we told you yesterday, everyone's favorite hip-hop producer named after cheese, Swizz Beatz, may have a domestic scandal brewing. Allegedly, he's doing things with little-known singer Christina Elizabeth that he should be doing with his wife, very well-known singer Alicia Keys.

Today we learn Swizz, in a seemingly Kobe-like move, purchased his wife an alledged "Damn baby, I'm sorry" present. The gift? A brand-new red Lotus. And the timing of couldn't be stranger, on Swizz's birthday. Who gives someone a present on his own birthday? Someone who is trying very hard not to sleep on the couch. Although we image their couch is much nicer than our beds.

Photo: Twitter

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There is something very surreal and "Twilight Zone"-ish about a car that can only be started by a smaller version of itself. It looks and sounds cool, but we're a little afraid of being sucked into a fifth dimension where hamsters are treated as gods. Our weird fears didn't stop the makers of the new Pagani Huayra, a follow-up to the terror-inducing super-car Zonda, from actually bringing such a bizarre design to life.

Pictured above is the actual key that future owners of this $1.3 million behemoth will use. The aluminum mini car is made from the same metal as the wheels and comes apart to reveal an ignition key and a USB drive for drivers to load their favorite songs on the car's stereo. May we suggest the "Twilight Zone" theme?

Source: Top Speed

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